A little Steven Curtis Chapman and CS Lewis
Thoughts from Wednesday's planning period...
I think a source of frustration for humans is that we're not really created for this world. To quote Steven Curtis Chapman (man, I can't believe I'm about to quote the Mullet King of CCM! How come a Dylan or Derek lyric couldn't pop into my mind at this very crucial, introspective moment?):
To all the travelers, pilgrims longing for a home. From one who walks with you on the journey called life's road, it is a long and winding road. From one who's seen the view and dreams of staying on the mountain high and one who's cried like you wanting too much just to lay down and die, I offer this, we must remember this: We are not home yet. So let us not grow weary or too content to stay 'cause we are not home yet.
To quote another rather trite sounding song (DC Talk's "Things of this World" -- from their stellar hit Nu Thang): Things of this world are passing away, here tomorrow but they're sure not here to stay. Things of this world are passing away, so lay your treasure above and start to live for Him today. I just had a thought, instead of citing song lyrics, I could just cite the Bible verses that the songs are based on (however...the sad truth is, I have memorized far more lyrics than I have Bible verses...sad). Anyhow, I have known the truths that SCC and DCT have sung about for quite some time now. I know it doesn't matter at all if my jeans come from the Gap or Walmart. It really doesn't make me any less of a person that my car has a semi-broken tape player (that's right, folks, no CD player for me) or that there are no power windows or locks and that most 16 year olds drive a better car than I do to school. It really doesn't bother me, really. (I do get bothered, however, when my muffler falls off or the check engine light comes on or the tire is flat again). I'm actually quite sorry for pressuring my mom when I was 9 to buy me Keds instead of just basic white canvas shoes. (The only difference was the $15 blue tag on the back of the shoe.) So, I don't think I have ever really had a problem (except for my stupid desire for Keds) to have the most expensive material possessions. I know that these things don't matter and will certainly pass away. However, it's becoming increasingly clear to me that some other things don't matter either.
I have always been a person who craves relationship (and I'm not referring to a dating relationship). I've always wanted a personal relationship with every single teacher I've ever had (which became increasingly difficult to accomplish once I entered high school and met some pretty scary math and science teachers). I've always longed for relationships with best friends. Because of my desire for friendship, I've made some pretty poor choices (not necessarily that I've chosen the wrong friends, but I have chosen to stay friends with people who have hurt or disappointed me over and over). My mom used to always tell me, "When someone shows you his/her true colors, believe it!" I would never believe it; I would always say, "Well, I'm sure that will never happen again." The fact that it takes me a long time to give up on a friendship has been something I've actually always liked about me (however, the older I get, the easier it becomes for me to walk away from a friendship). I think this craving for relationship stems from my desire to know others well and also to be known well by others. I don't think that many people have known me well, and I also think that could be a good thing :-). I think that I have lots of friends who know me pretty well, but not nearly as well as I would like to be known. (On a completely side note: Upon thinking about this, it's become clear to me that sometimes those who know me best are not the ones who I would necessarily choose to be the ones who know me best. And the opposite is kind of true, too. Those who I would like to know me the best, well, they sometimes end up not knowing me at all.)
And now I will begin to attempt to tie it all together...
I don't really care about all of the material stuff. Yes, I'm glad I have my Taylor guitar and even though I don't care, my jeans do come from the Gap (mainly because those are the ones that fit the best), and as long as my car runs, it's really not the end of the world if I have to listen to the radio instead of enjoying a CD. Instead, I have been focused on establishing meaningful relationships with those around me. I value my relationships with others greatly and have noticed that at times I still feel lonely.
I've also never been driven or motivated to choose a career/job in order to make a lot of money. I was always the one in college who told others, "It doesn't matter what you major in, or what you choose to do, just make sure you're happy." I will admit it definitely got on my nerves by my senior year to hear people say, "English? What are you going to do with that? Just teach?" Most people don't think before they open their stupid mouths. So, I am a girl who loves her Creator. I love His creation. I love reading about His grace. I love reading about His love. I love reading about His judgement. And even still, there are times when I'm lonely and left wanting more.
I think that I'll always have this bit that's unfulfilled and it's because I wasn't created for this world. I am not home yet and instead of trying to fix that void, I should delight in it. Praise God that I am not fulfilled by material items, frienships or relationships with others, and even my relationship with God, Himself, as it exists here on earth.
I really enjoy reading C.S. Lewis and have recently stumbled upon these quotes (the Till We Have Faces quote was actually stumbled upon back in February when I decided to read it again upon hearing that it was one of my good friend's, Jed, favorite books. I'm so glad I did reread and the following quote is just one that touched me).
If I find in myself a desire which no experience in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that I was made for another world. *Mere Christianity
It was when I was happiest that I longed the most...The sweetest thing in all my life had been the longing to find the place where all the beauty came from. *Till We Have Faces
I guess I'll always be longing and craving something...the place where all beauty comes from, God's home. I'm ok with that. One day.
I think a source of frustration for humans is that we're not really created for this world. To quote Steven Curtis Chapman (man, I can't believe I'm about to quote the Mullet King of CCM! How come a Dylan or Derek lyric couldn't pop into my mind at this very crucial, introspective moment?):
To all the travelers, pilgrims longing for a home. From one who walks with you on the journey called life's road, it is a long and winding road. From one who's seen the view and dreams of staying on the mountain high and one who's cried like you wanting too much just to lay down and die, I offer this, we must remember this: We are not home yet. So let us not grow weary or too content to stay 'cause we are not home yet.
To quote another rather trite sounding song (DC Talk's "Things of this World" -- from their stellar hit Nu Thang): Things of this world are passing away, here tomorrow but they're sure not here to stay. Things of this world are passing away, so lay your treasure above and start to live for Him today. I just had a thought, instead of citing song lyrics, I could just cite the Bible verses that the songs are based on (however...the sad truth is, I have memorized far more lyrics than I have Bible verses...sad). Anyhow, I have known the truths that SCC and DCT have sung about for quite some time now. I know it doesn't matter at all if my jeans come from the Gap or Walmart. It really doesn't make me any less of a person that my car has a semi-broken tape player (that's right, folks, no CD player for me) or that there are no power windows or locks and that most 16 year olds drive a better car than I do to school. It really doesn't bother me, really. (I do get bothered, however, when my muffler falls off or the check engine light comes on or the tire is flat again). I'm actually quite sorry for pressuring my mom when I was 9 to buy me Keds instead of just basic white canvas shoes. (The only difference was the $15 blue tag on the back of the shoe.) So, I don't think I have ever really had a problem (except for my stupid desire for Keds) to have the most expensive material possessions. I know that these things don't matter and will certainly pass away. However, it's becoming increasingly clear to me that some other things don't matter either.
I have always been a person who craves relationship (and I'm not referring to a dating relationship). I've always wanted a personal relationship with every single teacher I've ever had (which became increasingly difficult to accomplish once I entered high school and met some pretty scary math and science teachers). I've always longed for relationships with best friends. Because of my desire for friendship, I've made some pretty poor choices (not necessarily that I've chosen the wrong friends, but I have chosen to stay friends with people who have hurt or disappointed me over and over). My mom used to always tell me, "When someone shows you his/her true colors, believe it!" I would never believe it; I would always say, "Well, I'm sure that will never happen again." The fact that it takes me a long time to give up on a friendship has been something I've actually always liked about me (however, the older I get, the easier it becomes for me to walk away from a friendship). I think this craving for relationship stems from my desire to know others well and also to be known well by others. I don't think that many people have known me well, and I also think that could be a good thing :-). I think that I have lots of friends who know me pretty well, but not nearly as well as I would like to be known. (On a completely side note: Upon thinking about this, it's become clear to me that sometimes those who know me best are not the ones who I would necessarily choose to be the ones who know me best. And the opposite is kind of true, too. Those who I would like to know me the best, well, they sometimes end up not knowing me at all.)
And now I will begin to attempt to tie it all together...
I don't really care about all of the material stuff. Yes, I'm glad I have my Taylor guitar and even though I don't care, my jeans do come from the Gap (mainly because those are the ones that fit the best), and as long as my car runs, it's really not the end of the world if I have to listen to the radio instead of enjoying a CD. Instead, I have been focused on establishing meaningful relationships with those around me. I value my relationships with others greatly and have noticed that at times I still feel lonely.
I've also never been driven or motivated to choose a career/job in order to make a lot of money. I was always the one in college who told others, "It doesn't matter what you major in, or what you choose to do, just make sure you're happy." I will admit it definitely got on my nerves by my senior year to hear people say, "English? What are you going to do with that? Just teach?" Most people don't think before they open their stupid mouths. So, I am a girl who loves her Creator. I love His creation. I love reading about His grace. I love reading about His love. I love reading about His judgement. And even still, there are times when I'm lonely and left wanting more.
I think that I'll always have this bit that's unfulfilled and it's because I wasn't created for this world. I am not home yet and instead of trying to fix that void, I should delight in it. Praise God that I am not fulfilled by material items, frienships or relationships with others, and even my relationship with God, Himself, as it exists here on earth.
I really enjoy reading C.S. Lewis and have recently stumbled upon these quotes (the Till We Have Faces quote was actually stumbled upon back in February when I decided to read it again upon hearing that it was one of my good friend's, Jed, favorite books. I'm so glad I did reread and the following quote is just one that touched me).
If I find in myself a desire which no experience in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that I was made for another world. *Mere Christianity
It was when I was happiest that I longed the most...The sweetest thing in all my life had been the longing to find the place where all the beauty came from. *Till We Have Faces
I guess I'll always be longing and craving something...the place where all beauty comes from, God's home. I'm ok with that. One day.
posted by alisa beth at 1:37 PM
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